


you don't have to call me lieutenant (and i don't want to be your son)

by Neigedens



Category: Community
Genre: 100-1000 Words, F/M, Porn Battle
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-27
Updated: 2010-01-27
Packaged: 2017-10-06 17:48:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/56250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Neigedens/pseuds/Neigedens
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She shuts the door decisively and locks it, and almost immediately he's grabbing her face and they're kissing again. "God, you're so wonderful," he murmurs into her mouth, and of course it's always nice to hear that sort of thing, even from a shallow metrosexual playboy like Jeff.</p>
            </blockquote>





	you don't have to call me lieutenant (and i don't want to be your son)

**Author's Note:**

> The prompt word was "stepdad."

Shirley is a naturally tactile kind of person. She always has been, but with Jeff everything turns out a little different than it probably should. What starts as what she considers an acceptable amount of touching --putting her hands on his shoulders when she's standing behind him reading what he's reading, placing his hand on the small of her back when he slips in behind her in the lunch line-- ends, well, in the supply closet one afternoon after art class when everyone's (hopefully) gone home.

She shuts the door decisively and locks it, and almost immediately he's grabbing her face and they're kissing again. "God, you're so wonderful," he murmurs into her mouth, and of course it's always nice to hear that sort of thing, even from a shallow metrosexual playboy like Jeff.

They're _going_ to do this; she's always had a thing for tall men, incipient baldness notwithstanding. Plus Jeff's undeniably got other charms as well, charms not limited to the way one of his hands has traveled down to her hip and is trying to find how to get under her shirt. And it'll be a nice little self-esteem boost for both of them, but Shirley still believes some cursory protest is necessary.

"This is wrong," she says.

"I know!" he says, not even trying to sound sorry at all.

"No, I--" and here she pauses just a little bit, putting her hands on his shoulders and stepping back so her back's against the door. "This is a horrible idea."

He probably agrees, but Jeff is a naturally contrary kind person and seems ready for an argument. He puts his hands on her shoulders now and rubs them in a gesture that's personal enough to be sweet and condescending enough to be annoying. "And just why is that?"

"Because--," and right there she panics and, of all the probably good reasons, her mind lands on the stupidest of them all. "What kind of stepdad would you be to my kids?"

"Well, I...." This seems to confuse him. "I don't know. I thought your kids liked me."

"Maybe they do, but what kind of example would you set for them? You're a horrible role model."

"Why do they need me for a role model? I'm more of a cool-uncle type, or something like that. They have you for a role model, I could be their mom's cool friend who's not above buying them off to gain their affection." He considers. "And they would be nice gifts, not chintzy t-shirts that their grandma probably sends them or that Pierce probably would if he were--"

"Oh god, why are we talking about Pierce? Or my kids?"

"Well, _I_ don't know. You brought it--." It's not easy to kiss him when he's standing up straight, but she manages it by grabbing the back of his head and standing up as tall as she can. "That was a 'be quiet and take your pants off' kind of kiss if I ever saw one."

"Oh, shut up," she mutters.

"Told you." He smiles and just then his hand finally succeeds at finding the hem of her blouse and the skin beneath it.

"God forgive me," she says as she stands on her tiptoes to kiss him again.


End file.
